The Beauty Myth. Oy. I've sat here and thought and thought and thought. I know that the media influences our concept of beauty. I know that the media portrays an extremely warped version of what they call beauty. There is an ever growing pressure on women and young girls to be beautiful and I wholeheartedly think that this is intrinsically wrong and, to some extent, downright evil. No one should be made to feel that their physical appearance is directly linked to their value as a person.
Yet here I sit, a proud and ardent feminist, who wants to be pretty. Yes I want people to think that I am intelligent, but I also want people to think I'm pretty. How the hell do I rationalize that with what I've just previously stated? I can totally rationalize that I like make-up and long blue-black eyelashes, that's easy. Yes, it is society that dictates that long, lush lashes are best, but in choosing to make my transparent blonde lashes lovely and dark I'm not really usurping my feminist beliefs. Yes, I'm buying into the beauty machine that costs us all hundreds a year, but I'm not giving up any real power.
If I had to choose between being intelligent or being physically beautiful, I'd choose intelligence every time. That doesn't mean that I don't want to feel physically beautiful, too. I could go off on a tangent about what real beauty is, but I've already done that in my Born to Be Beautiful post so you can read that again if you like. I know you are as beautiful as you feel but that doesn't stop me from wanting to feel attractive, too.
I know that feminists can be physically beautiful. Gloria Steinem is one of the most physically beautiful (and just straight up beautiful) people I have ever seen in real life: she is stunning. She's also an intellectual and political icon and powerhouse. She had the most amazing nails (yes, I noticed so what?), so are you going to say that since she had well manicured nails that she's not a real feminist for buying into the beauty machine? Obviously not.
I think I'm rambling here now but my point is that you can want to be pretty, but still not condone the so called beauty myth. I can use make-up but still disapprove of over photo-shopped and airbrushed images in magazines. I sometimes have trouble reconciling the fact that I WANT to look pretty with the fact that the media PRESSURES women to look pretty. I think what all feminists want is a more realistic portrayal of beauty in the media; a beauty that is all colours, shapes, sizes, ethnicities, sexualities and ages. It's okay to want to look good, but we shouldn't feel pressured to look good. At least I hope so....
Feminist Friday XVI:
The Beauty Myth
Here's how it works. Write a blog about being a feminist mom, raising a feminist child, a rant or anything that falls under the realm of the theme for the week. Come back and link your post and post the button on your blog.
That's it.
You don't even have to be a blogger to take part - just send me your post and I will publish it on my blog for you. You don't even have to include your name if you prefer.
When you've published it, come back on Friday and via a widget thing you can add a link to your post and share it with everyone. The link remains open for 4 days.
Visit others, comment if you like them or feel inspired by them. Just go out and encourage and support other feminist Moms.
The more support you give, the more you will get back! I can't wait to meet and interact with other feminist moms around the world!
There are things I know I do as a mother because I am a feminist. I don't let gender stereotypes influence my purchases or decisions for Blondie Boy. I don't let my being a mother define me; even though it is a very big part of who I am, it is not all I am. However, when I stop to think about raising Blondie Boy as a feminist, well I get a bit stuck.
If I was raising a daughter I think maybe it would be more straight forward, but how do you raise a feminist son? The best I can come up with is that his father and I set a good example of what feminists are. I think a lot of it is pretty easy. We teach him he can be anything he wants to be and support him in whatever he wants to do whether it's what culture deems to be "gender appropriate" or not.
He's just 17 months so how to raise him a feminist isn't something that really comes into play at the moment. When I mentioned to a colleague how much he loved Lady Gaga she asked if I was worried that this was giving him a poor template of what a beautiful woman is. I'll give you that Gaga is very thin, but he doesn't see Gaga as anything other than someone who sings songs that he likes. I realize as he gets older I will have to temper what the media shows him and help counteract the poor messages most mainstream media sends out about women.
For right now I think all I can do is be a feminist myself and let him follow the example his father and I set for him. Sure someday I know I'll have to get into it more deeply with him. I'd hope though if I teach him what's right and wrong, how to respect others and all the other things you should teach a child regardless that he'd find his feminist identity on his own.
I don't think my parents particularly set out to raise a feminist daughter, but they certainly have one (if not two) of them now. I'd like to think that positive and supportive parents raise feminist children whether they set out to or not. Or am I being too naïve?
Here's how it works. Write a blog about being a feminist mom, raising a feminist child, a rant or anything that falls under the realm of the theme for the week. Come back and link your post and post the button on your blog.
That's it.
You don't even have to be a blogger to take part - just send me your post and I will publish it on my blog for you. You don't even have to include your name if you prefer.
When you've published it, come back on Friday and via a widget thing you can add a link to your post and share it with everyone. The link remains open for 4 days.
Visit others, comment if you like them or feel inspired by them. Just go out and encourage and support other feminist Moms.
The more support you give, the more you will get back! I can't wait to meet and interact with other feminist moms around the world!
