Friday 18 May 2012

Feminist Friday: Stickers are Sexless

These books have been staring at me for the past couple of weeks and taunting me. Blondie Boy loves stickers, LOVES stickers, so I see sticker books that are relatively inexpensive and I want to buy them for him but you see I can't. I can't because in my honest opinion these stickers books are sexist. How can sticker books be sexist you say? Well grab yourself something to drink and settle in and I'll tell you.




Now I understand some of you might be thinking "what's the big deal?" Well the big deal is gender stereotyping is not okay. Blondie Boy loves trucks and cars but he also loves giraffes, hearts, puppy dogs and fairies (specifically one Miss Abby Cadabby but more on her another time). I hear you 'no big deal' folks saying "Fine just get him the girl's book." That isn't the point. Why do the books even need to be "boy's" and "girl's"? I know Blondie Boy has colouring and sticker books called "big book of cars" or "animals" so why the need to define with boy and girl?


In playing into culturally constructed norms of what either sex should like or be these books are subtly chipping away at our children's identities. Yes, I'm going to take it THAT far because there will be some little boy who goes to get a sticker book and reaches for the copy with giraffes, fairies and ponies only to be told, no that is the girl's book. That little child will have to compromise who they are and what they like because some marketing genius has decided what is for boys and what is for girls and slapped the label on sticker books accordingly.


In my opinion there are no such things are girls things and boys things as far as toys and playthings are concerned. Yes our external and internal genitalia do differentiate male from female but last time I checked most children's toys don't actually require a penis or a vulva/vagina so really why are toys marked as boy and girl? Physically and mentally boys and girls can play with the exact same toys so there is no need to market them as sex specific. Let children choose on their own what they want to play with and enjoy.


I like to buy toys that Blondie Boy would like but as much as he might like either of those colouring books I will not buy them. We have to buck the "snips and snails" versus "sugar and spice" dichotomy or it will just continue. 


At Cybher last Saturday I said to me being a feminist blogger means not shutting up. So I'm not going to shut up. I'll rant about sticker books and anything else that pisses me off and if even one person reads my rants and it makes them think differently then I think I've done my job. Things can't change if you don't let anyone know things are wrong.


22 comments:

Melaina25 said...

Argh this gets right on my K cups too! My little boy is 18 months old. His current obsessions are stethoscopes, helicopters and prams. I've bought him two stethoscopes, 3 helicopters and although his little heart will leap with glee if I were to, I've not took the plunge and bought him a little doll pram to push. Why? Because my husband will go ape shit. Like he did when i dressed him in a pink baby grow (it says 'boy' across the front and is bloody awesome), or when I taught him to do jazz hands or when I put his curls in a ponytail. Well done for speaking out. You're damn right!

Melaina25 said...

I am even more gutted I couldn't be at the Cybher conference now I've read your latest blog post. Would have so liked to meet you! I could have written those exact same words for my 'used to be blondie now a temporarily pimply teenager' son who was also a sticker fanatic and all the books then were gender specific too.

Rock on feminism! I was getting a little scared that all our efforts in the late 60's and 70's had been for nought. But people like you give me renewed faith. Thank you.

PS. Lord Dodo (my sometime alter ego) does some stickers he might like! Lots of little dodos doing stuff - you might like them too :)

Melaina25 said...

I sometimes worry that our efforts in  the 60s and 70s - my growing-up-into-a-woman years - were wasted. I go out to shop for toys for my granddaughter and find that nowadays you  can get a tool set for a girl or a kitchen for a boy. That ought to be a step forward - but no! You can tell the toolset is for a girl because it is pink. And the kitchen is for a boy because it is blue. Why not let the tool set be tool set coloured and the kitchen be kitchen coloured, and have the marketing material show both boys and girls playing with them? I have a sneaky feeling it is because the manufacturers want to convince parents who have children of both sexes that they need to buy two of every toy.

Melaina25 said...

... and this sort of stupidity doesn't end with childrens' stuff. I saw Nike advertise its new running shoes the other day: pink for women and bluefor men.

Melaina25 said...

(I'm going to play devil's advocate hope that is okay)
Did your husband ever push your son in his pram? I'm going to venture to say at some point he pushed him in a pram or pushchair so what is "wrong" with a son wanting to emulate what his father does? For that matter what is wrong with a son wanting to do what his mother does?I say get a freaking pushchair for the kid if he wants one!

Melaina25 said...

Believe me I know I greatly appreciate the work and activism of all feminist waves that have come before me and who knows what wave we are on now (4th?) but I know that feminism is alive and kicking!

Melaina25 said...

It is so ridiculous because this whole "pink for girls, blue for boys" thing is completely constructed by consumerism. It was only in the past 100 years or so that it was decided--pink used to "be" for boys. I think this is one of the reasons I like Little Tykes. Blondie Boy has a gorgeous kitchen coloured kitchen :)

Melaina25 said...

I think giving colour options is fine-- I personally really like pink but if the ONLY options are pink for girls/women and blue for boys/men that annoys me.


I went to a press event and we were all given medals; my fellow female bloggers all had pink, but I had blue because they thought I was a man. Totally ridiculous. 

Melaina25 said...

Hear hear! It saddens me that the world seems to be taking retrograde steps in terms of gender stereotyping toys etc - the lines seem to be drawn far more clearly and sharply than when I was growing up in the 70s and 80s. What's that all about? Well, marketing and maximising sales I guess. It sure as hell isn't about liberation or progress. (Found you via blow your own bloghorn btw)

Melaina25 said...

I completely agree and I guess the only way we can do anything is by saying something about it-- both as parents and as consumers.

Melaina25 said...

In this case there were no other options - womens shoes only came in pink and mens only in blue :|

Melaina25 said...

 Prams are most often pink too. :o(

Melaina25 said...

It's the pink and blue lego that gets me. Lego! 

I am also a bit saddened to hear from my Mum that when she was dressing me, it was all yellows and greens and such all round. These days getting anything for a girl that doesn't have pink somewhere on it is quite an achievement. At least boys clothes are brightening up though. When my son was first born is was dark moody and mud coloured and that was your lot.

Melaina25 said...

I completely get your view point here, but in my experience with my kids (boy and girl) no matter how much I tried to get them to play with toys that were manufactured for the opposite sex it never worked. I do agree though that young children shouldn't have these strange sexist restrictions placed on them.

Raj

Melaina25 said...

Have you ever wondered why dinosaurs are considered a boys' interest, and not a girls'? And horses are for girls, not boys? I so agree with this post. We all know that boys are more likely to be interested in vehicles, and girls in dolls, but the segregation has been encouraged and set in stone, and exaggerated beyond belief. 

Have you read a book "Cinderella Ate My Daughter"? I can't recommend it highly enough. It deals with this issue from the point of view of bringing up a girl, but I think it's so important for parents of boys to think about the subject too - as you are.

Melaina25 said...

I feel the same dismay every time I go into Toys R Us to buy presents for my kids. The shop is divided into boys toys - all flashing lights and exciting speedy things in black and green and bright colours. The girls get two aisles of simpering pink and some princess dressing up clothes. You would have thought we'd come far enough to see some change when it comes to the gender stereotyping of toys. Sadly not. Everybody makes far more money if you have to buy two of everything.

Melaina25 said...

I saw these sticker books for sale recently and was tempted to buy one, until I saw how gender stereotyped they were.

Big Fashionista said...

Excellent post. My son is surrounded by sisters! He used to love playing with his sisters dolls house for hours. And why not? Totally agree with what you say here

Melaina25 said...

I wouldn't mind the themes if they'd just get rid of the 'boys ' and 'girls' titles. In the same way as with age discrimination or whatever.
I was so conscious when I had my daughter that I wanted to avoid gender specific toys, I thought I had done quite well. I couldn't help what other people gave her but she ended up preferring books to toys anyway.
After the two boys I realised the mistake I had made, I joke that girls have more choice with clothes and boys have more choice with toys- boys toys are just fab! We all love them! But, what am I talking about? I guess cars, and trains more than anything else. 
Theme toys by colour, age, activity.... that would be a good start.

Melaina25 said...

Why are there boys' and girls' stickers? Because the manufacturer can probably sell more that way, sadly. Little girls are being sold a pre-packaged idea of what femininity means. For that matter, sexist marketing restricts the way little boys can explore their masculinity too.

Melaina25 said...

Oh my gosh. I freaking love you. I'm a staunch feminist, so I'm so glad that somebody else gets pissed off about these sorts of issues. Sometimes I feel like the only person I know who cares about how they show boobs in movies but not penises, or how ad campaigns constantly display women in lingerie. It's so nice to know I'm not the only person. :)

Melaina25 said...

You are definitely NOT the only person :)